What heartbroken really is….

Current mood:  happy

Oh to be so naive to think that love and or heartbreaking can come and go after a short relationship. I was once so naive to think that I had had my heart broken a few times and was in love but now having really gone through it I realize that back then those “heartbreaks” were nothing compared to the real thing.

Heartbreak is….
Marrying what you thought was the love of your life only to be told that it was all just a facade. To learn that you were lied to from the very first date, to learn that the person you married wasnt really who he was after all these years.

Heartbreak is….
Telling your husband that you feel like their is someone else he is involved with and hearing the words “their is, I dont want to be with you anymore”.

Heartbreak is….
Being suddenly single at 37 weeks pregnant and explaining to your 3.5 yo that mommy and Ian are moving elsewhere (without daddy).

Heartbreak is….
Having hope, moving back together and working on your marriage for months, putting everything into it and thinking that things were going to be okay ONLY to be blindsided by a dear Jane letter the day before vday telling you that your love has left you for another woman.

Heartbreak is….
Going to pick up your love from school pleading to go to counseling and that we can make it work. Only to be turned down and told that your love has been sleeping with this other woman since your second born child was only 3 weeks old.

Heartbreak is….
Looking your children in the eyes and knowing that they will never have mommy and daddy together again.

Heartbreak is….
Hearing your oldest tell you over and over again “but daddy still loves you”.

Heartbreak is….
The fear of loosing your children to some other “mom”.

Hearbreak is….
Loosing that familiar kiss, touch, voice, ear….shoulder to cry on.

Heartbreak is….
Knowing that you failed.

THAT is heartbreak and I dont wish it on anyone. I am sorry if I make you uncomfortable or make it hard on you. I am not there to throw anything in your face and I hope you realize that.

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Cheyenne aka Mommy
Beautifully and factually written. It is absolutely one of the most difficult things to endure but with sorrow comes joy in the most unexpected ways. I am here if you ever want to talk.
Posted by Cheyenne aka Mommy on April 18, 2008 – Friday – 3:45 PM
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Always Màthair
Heartbreak is !!!!
But in time, you do recover, especially from the lies
It has taken me two years Julie to find a little bit more of myself that I lost to 30 years of lies and emotional abuse! It hasn’t been easy. I’m 55 and living with my parents again! We aren’t divorced. To much crap over the house and all for Harley to loose, so we let it be. All my things are piled into one room over on Garfield.
Each day I work on me, or at least I try to, and try to let all that crap go because I chose to not let it be a part of my life any longer! And when I try to be nice to him when we are around each other, I can easily say, well , that’s enough for today and I can leave with no guilt.
Finding yourself again for your kids is the most important thing right now.
Your not alone! You didn’t fail! And you will make a great Dad as well as a great mom for Ian! I have no doubt!
Don’t get sucked back in no matter what!!! Stay strong, keep that head up and be easy on yourself! One step at a time, and when the air gets heavy, grab those babes up and go out somewhere, for a walk, to a playground, show them the world we live in and that it can be ok!
Posted by Always Màthair on April 20, 2008 – Sunday – 10:19 AM
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